An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
Biting someone with your natural teeth is "simple assault", while biting someone with your false teeth is "aggravated assault".
Communism has been against the law in Haines City, La., since 1950.
If you've ever been to Mardi Gras in New Orleans, you'll see the kings and queens on the various floats throwing plastic money, medallions and jewels to the crowd, but not food. It's against the law to throw food from a float in the Mardi Gras festivities.
It is against state law to steal even a single crawfish.
It is illegal to gargle in public places.
It is illegal to rob a bank and then shoot at the bank teller with a water pistol.
It illegal for a woman to drive a car unless her husband is waving a flag in front of it.
It is illegal in Lafayette, Louisiana to play a musical instrument for the purpose of attracting attention, without a license.
It's legal to walk down the street with a drink in New Orleans, even to drive with a drink. But if you fall over and block the sidewalk, you've just broken the law.
Louisiana law prohibits couples who are shopping for a new bed from putting it to the "ultimate test"-- in other words, from trying it out by making love on it, or even simulating this activity.
Mourners at a wake may not eat more than three sandwiches.
New Orleans: You may not tie an alligator to a fire hydrant.
Rituals that involve the ingestion of blood, urine, or fecal matter are not allowed.
Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.
Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts.
You may not tie an alligator to a fire hydrant.
After January 14th you will be charged a fine for having your Christmas decorations still up.
In Augusta to stroll down the street playing a violin is against the law.
It's illegal to clean salmon along Maine's upper Kennebec River. Enforcement of this law has been made easier for many years by the fact that, because of a dam, there are no salmon on the upper Kennebec River.
In Maine, it is illegal to sell a car on Sunday unless it comes equipped with plumbing.
In Maine it's illegal to catch lobsters with your bare hands.
In Portland shoelaces must be tied while walking down the street.
In Waterville, Maine, it is illegal to blow one's nose in public.
It's unlawful to tickle a woman's chin with a feather duster in Portland.
Shoelaces must be tied while walking down the street.
Shotguns are required to be taken to church in the event of a Native American attack.
You may not step out of a plane in flight.
Baltimore City: Though you may spit on a city roadway, spitting on city sidewalks is prohibited. You may not curse inside the city limits.
Baltimore: It's illegal to throw bales of hay from a second-story window within the city limits. It's illegal to take a lion to the movies. It is a park rule violation to be in a public park with a sleeveless shirt. $10 fine. This would include joggers that go shirtless. (1898) -Park Rule 6 It is a violation of city code to sell chicks or ducklings to a minor within 1 week of the Easter holiday.
Baltimore has regulations governing the disposal of hog's heads, pet droppings and oyster shells.
Columbia: You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you can have a 25' satellite dish. Though clotheslines are banned, clothes may be draped over a fence.
Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited.
Gypsies should steer clear of Caroline County, Md., where it's a $100 fine or six months in the can for "forecasting or pretending to foretell the future."
In Baltimore it's illegal to block the sidewalk with a box. But the offense only carries a $1 fine. Another law makes it illegal to throw bale of hay (or of anything else) out a second-story window. That gets you a $20 fine.
In Baltimore it's illegal to play professional croquet before 2 p.m. Sunday. The law also applies to professional quoits.
In Baltimore it is illegal to mistreat oysters.
In Baltimore, it is illegal to wash or scrub sinks no matter how dirty they get.
In Baltimore, Maryland, it is not legal to take a lion to the movies.
In Halethrope, Maryland kisses longer than one second are illegal.
In Maryland, a woman may not go through her husband's pockets while he is sleeping.
In Maryland, men may not buy drinks for female bartenders.
In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises."
In Maryland, the legislature once proposed a board of parachute examiners to be made up of five licensed parachute instructors who would test and license all other parachute instructors. The plan had been abandoned when it was learned there were only three licensed parachute instructors in the state.
In the entire state of Maryland, it is illegal to give or recieve oral sex.
It is a violation to be in a public park with a sleeveless shirt. $10 fine.
It's illegal to take a lion to the movies.
Maryland now requires that alcohol beverage writers be certified as experts by an agency of the state before they can receive product samples, which it limits to three bottles per brand.
Ocean City: A law from the early 1900's prohibits men from going topless on the Boardwalk. Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited
Thistles may not grow in one's yard.
You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you can have a 25' satellite dish.
You cannot swear while inside the city limits of Baltimore.
You cannot throw a bail of hay out of a second story window in Annapolis.
You may not curse inside the city limits.
A Boston mayor who disliked dancing and liked to retire early once banned midnight dancing in the Hub City.
A woman can not be on top in sexual activities.
Affiliation with the Communist party is illegal.
Alcoholic drink specials are illegal.
All men must carry a rifle to church on Sunday.
An old ordinance declares goatees illegal unless you first pay a special license fee for the privilege of wearing one in public.
At a wake, mourners may eat no more than three sandwiches.
Boston: It is illegal to play the fiddle. Two people may not kiss in front of a church. No more than two baths may be taken within the confines of the city. No one may cross the Boston Common without carrying a shotgun in case of bears. Anyone may let their sheep and cows graze in the public gardens/commons at any time except o Sundays. It is illegal to eat peanuts in church. An old law prohibits the taking of baths on Sunday. Duels to the death permitted on the common on Sundays provided that the Governor is present. Women may not wear heels over 3 inches in length while on the common. No one may take a bath without a prescription. It is illegal for any citizen to own more than three dogs.
Both Massachusetts and New Hampshire had old laws that penalized gamblers who lost money. You'd get fined in Massachusetts if you had any money left.
Bullets may not be used as currency.
Burlington: You may not walk around with a "drink".
Cambridge: It is illegal to shake carpets in the street, or to throw orange peels on the sidewalk. It costs $50 extra for a permit for hurling, soccer or Gaelic football games in a public park on a Sunday.
Children may smoke, but they may not purchase cigarettes.
Defacing a milk carton is punishable by a $10 fine.
Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited.
Hingham: You may not have colored lights on your house if it can be seen from Main Street. Only white lights may be visible. If you live on Main Street and want to paint your house, the colors must be approved by the historical society.
Hopkinton: Though horses and cows are allowed on the common, dogs are prohibited.
Hunting on Sundays is prohibited.
Holyoke, Massachusetts, makes it unlawful to water your lawn when it is raining.
In a law that predates returnable bottles and cans, it's illegal in Boston to rummage through rubbish containers.
In 1659 the state of Massachusetts outlawed Christmas.
In Boston it's illegal to post an advertisement on a public urinal. It's also against the law to hang a vending machine on a utility pole.
In Boston, it's illegal to cut firewood in the street, or shoot a bow and arrow in the street.
In Boston it's against the law to keep manure in a building unless the building is being used as a stable. If it is, you can keep up to two cords of manure. If you're overstocked, you need a permit to move the stuff. And you can't leave it in the street.
In Boston, Massachusetts it is illegal to take a bath unless instructed to do so by a physician.
In Massachusetts, it is unlawful to deliver diapers on Sunday, regardless of emergencies.
In Massachusetts you must have a license to wear a goatee.
In Massachusetts, if you get caught eating peanuts in church , you can be jailed for up to one year.
In Provincetown, Mass., it's illegal to sell suntan oil until after noon on Sunday.
In Salem, Massachesetts sleeping in the nude in a rented room is forbidden, even for married couples.
It is illegal to frighten a pigeon.
It is illegal to go to bed without first having a full bath.
It is illegal to put tomatoes in clam chowder.
It is illegal to reproach Jesus Christ or the holy ghost.
It is illegal to take more than 2 baths a month within Boston confines.
It is unlawful to injure a football goal post, doing so is punishable by a $200 fine
It's illegal to allow someone to use stilts while working on the construction of a building.
It's illegal to drive Texan, Mexican, Cherokee, or Indian cattle on a public road.
It's illegal to keep a mule on the second floor of a building not in a city unless there are 2 exits.
It's illegal to sell fewer than 24 ducklings at a time before May 1, or to sell rabbits, chicks, or ducklings that have been painted a different color.
It's illegal to take a lion to the movies.
Longmeadow: It is illegal for two men to carry a bathtub across the town green.
Marlboro: It is illegal to buy, sell or possess a squirt gun. Silly string is illegal in the city limits. One may not detonate a nuclear device in the city. It is illegal for any citizen to own more than two dogs.
Massachusetts law declares that peanuts may not be eaten in court.
Massachusetts liquor stores can only open on Sundays if they are in Berkshire, Essex, Franklin, Middlesex or Worcester counties and are within 10 miles of the Vermont or New Hampshire borders.
Milford: Peeping in the windows of automobiles is forbidden.
Mourners at a wake may not eat more than three sandwiches.
Newton: All families must be given a hog from the town's mayor.
No gorilla is allowed in the back seat of any car.
North Andover: An ordinance prohibits the use of space guns.
Peeping in the windows of automobiles is forbidden.
Public boxing matches are outlawed.
Quakers and witches are banned.
Snoring is prohibited unless all bedroom windows are closed and securely locked.
Southbridge, Massachusetts, makes it illegal to read books or newspapers after 8 p.m. in the streets.
Tattooing and body piercing is illegal.
Taxi drivers are prohibited from making love in the front seat of their taxi during their shifts.
There is a Massachusetts law requiring all dogs to have their hind legs tied during the month of April.
Tomatoes may not be used in the production of clam chowder.
Under an old law in Marblehead, Mass., it was illegal to cross the street on Sunday, unless absolutely necessary.
Woburn: In bars, it is illegal to "walk around" with a beer in your hand.
You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you can have a 25' satellite dish.
You may not curse inside the city limits.
You may not, at any time take a crap on your neighbour.
A Michigan law states that a wife's hair legally belongs to her husband.
A woman isn't allowed to cut her own hair without her husband's permission.
Any person over the age of 12 may have a license for a handgun as long as he/she has not been convicted of a felony.
In Clawson, Mich., there is a law that makes it LEGAL for a farmer to sleep with his pigs, cows, horses, goats, and chickens.
In Detroit, couples are not allowed to make love in an automobile unless the act takes place while the vehicle is parked on the couple's own property.
In Detroit, Michigan it is illegal to sleep in a bathtub.
In Rochester, Michigan, anyone bathing in public must have his or her bathing suit inspected by a police officer.
It is legal for a robber to file a law suit, if he or she got hurt in your house.
It is illegal to loiter in the city morgue in Detroit.
It's illegal in Michigan for a person under the age of 21 to give a gift of alcohol beverage to anyone, even to a person of legal age.
Permitting diners to take home an unfinished bottle of alcohol beverage, rather than consuming it all before leaving to prevent "waste," encourages moderation and discourages intoxication. However, this is prohibited in Michigan.
Smoking while in bed is illegal.
The use of the names of dead presidents to sell alcohol in Michigan is prohibited.
Under an 1889 law, the health officer of East Jordan, Mich., could send any nonresident with an infectious disease back to where he came from, as long as the person could travel. If not, the officer could rent a house for use as a pest house.
You may not swear in front of women and children in the state of Michigan.
A Blue Earth, Minnesota, law declares that no child under the age of twelve may talk over the telephone unless monitored by a parent.
A Minnesota tax form is quite thorough. Some would say too thorough. It even asks for your date of death.
A person may not cross state lines with a duck atop his head.
A woman isn't allowed to cut her own hair without her husband's permission.
All bathtubs must have feet.
All men driving motorcycles must wear shirts.
Any person over the age of 12 may have a license for a handgun as long as he/she has not been convicted of a felony.
Citizens may not enter Wisconsin with a chicken on their head.
Clawson: There is a law that makes it legal for a farmer to sleep with his pigs, cows, horses, goats, and chickens.
Every man in Brainerd, Minnesota is required by law to grow a beard.
Grand Haven: No person shall throw an abandoned hoop skirt into any street or on any sidewalk, under penalty of a five- dollar fine for each offense.
Hamburgers may not be eaten on Sundays.
Harper Woods: It is illegal to paint sparrows to sell them as parakeets.
Hibbing: It shall be the duty of any policeman or any other officer to enforce the provisions of this Section, and if any cat is found running at large, or which is found in any street, alley or public place, it shall be the duty of any policeman or other officer of the city to kill such cat.
In Duluth, Minnesota it is illegal to allow animals to sleep in a bakery.
In Minnesota, it's illegal to tease skunks. (As if being sprayed weren't enough of a deterrent.)
It is illegal to sleep naked.
It is legal for a robber to file a law suit, if he or she got hurt in your house.
It used to be legal in Minnesota to sell rolled candy on Sunday, and illegal to sell flat candy. The wafer people have gotten this one repealed.
Minneapolis: Red cars can not drive down Lake Street
Minnesota has repealed its so-called "Twinkie" law, under which a Minneapolis City Council candidate was indicted for dispensing $34 worth of Twinkies, Ho-Hos, cookies, Kool-Aid and coffee to some senior citizens.
Minnesotans are forbade from teasing skunks.
No man is allowed to make love to his wife with the smell of garlic, onions, or sardines on his breath in Alexandria, Minnesota. If his wife so requests, law mandates that he must brush his teeth.
Oral sex is prohibited.
Public intoxication is a crime in Pennsylvania but specifically not a crime in Minnesota.
Rochester: All bathing suits must have been inspected by the head of police. Smoking while in bed is illegal.
St. Cloud: Hamburgers may not be eaten on Sundays.
There is a 10 cent bounty for each rat's head brought into a town office.
Virginia: You're not allowed to park your elephant on Main Street.
Wayland: Anyone can keep their cow on Main Street downtown at a cost of 3 cents per day.
You may not swear in front of women and children in the state of Michigan.
Kalamazoo: It is against the law to serenade your girlfriend.
Adultery or Fornication (living together while not married or having sex with someone that is not your spouse) results in a fine of $500 and/or 6 months in prison.
Cattle rustling is punishable by hanging.
Columbus: The fine for waving a gun in public is higher than actually shooting it.
Horses are not to be housed within 50 feet of any road.
In Brandon, Mississipi it is illegal to attempt to stop someone from walking down the sidewalk by parking a motorhome in their path.
In Temperance, MS, you can't walk a dog without dressing it in diapers.
In Oxford, Miss., it's illegal to "create unnecessary noises."
It is illegal for a male to be sexually aroused in public.
It is illegal to drive around the town square more than 100 times in a single session.
Oxford: It is illegal to drive around the town square more than 100 times in a single session. One may not spit on the sidewalks on the square. Motor vehicles on the square are prohibited. Horn honking is not permitted as it might scare horses.
Tylertown: It is unlawful to shave in the center of main street.
Unnatural intercourse, if both parties voluntarily participate, results in a maximum sentence of 10 years and $10,000.
Vagrancy is punishable by either 30 days in prison or a $201 fine.
Anyone under the age of 21 who takes out household trash containing even a single empty alcohol beverage container can be charged with illegal possession of alcohol in Missouri.
Buckner: In this small town of only 4,000, yard waste may be burned any day except Sunday.
Children can buy shotguns in Kansas City, Missouri... but not toy cap guns.
Excelsior Springs: Hard objects may not be thrown by hand. Worrying squirrels is not tolerated.
Four women may not rent an apartment together.
Hard objects may not be thrown by hand.
In Ballwin, Mo., the only place you can use vulgar, obscene or indecent language is in your home.
In Merryville women are prohibited from wearing corsets because "the privilege of admiring the curvaceous, unencumbered body of a young woman should not be denied to the normal, red-blooded American male."
In Springfield, door to door salesman are prohibited from selling their goods while standing in the middle of the road, screaming at passing vehicles.
In St. Louis, it's illegal to sit on the curb of any city street and drink beer from a bucket.
In St. Louis, a law on the books makes it illegal to park your car without turning off the engine. This was to avoid scaring horses.
It is illegal to have oral sex.
It is not illegal to speed.
It's illegal to sit on any street curb in St. Louis, Missouri, and drink beer from a bucket.
Kansas City: Minors are not allowed to purchase cap pistols, however they may buy shotguns freely. Installation of bathtubs with four legs resembling animal paws is prohibited.
Marceline: Minors can buy rolling paper and tobacco but not lighters.
Marquette: It is illegal for more than four unrelated persons to occupy the same dwelling (The Brothel Law).
Minors can buy rolling paper and tobacco but not lighters.
Minors in Kansas City, Missouri, are not allowed to purchase cap pistols; they may buy shotguns freely, however.
Mole: Frightening a baby is in violation of the law.
Natchez: It shall be unlawful to provide beer or other intoxicants to elephants.
Purdy: Dancing is strictly prohibited.
St. Louis: It's illegal to sit on the curb of any city street and drink beer from a bucket. This law refers back to the extinct Italian celebration, Hill Day, when beer was served in buckets. A milk man may not run while on duty.
University City: Four women may not rent an apartment together.
It is a felony for a wife to open her husband's mail.
It is illegal to have a sheep in the cab of your truck without a chaperone.
In Billings, Montana it is illegal for employees of the city's communications center to program their phones with speed dial.
Balls may not be thrown within the city limits.
It is a misdemeanor to show movies that depict acts of felonious crime in Montana.
Bozeman has a law that bans all sexual activity between members of the opposite sex in the front yard of a home after sundown -- if they're nude.
Seven or more Indians are considered a raiding or war party and it is legal to shoot them.
It is illegal for a man and a woman to have sex in any other position other than missionary style.
In Montana, it is illegal for married women to go fishing alone on Sundays, and illegal for unmarried women to fish alone at all.
It is a misdemeanor to show movies that depict acts of felonious crime.
It is a felony for a wife to open her husband's mail.
It is illegal to have a sheep in the cab of your truck without a chaperone.
Excelsior Springs: Balls may not be thrown within the city limits.
Helena: No item may be thrown across a street.
Helena, Montana, mandates that a woman can't dance on a table in a saloon or bar unless she has on at least three pounds, two ounces of clothing.
Salisbury: Pop bottles are not to be thrown on the ground.
Whitehall: It is illegal to operate a vehicle with ice picks attached to the wheels.
Montana just legalized the production of caviar.
